It was unexpected.
A coma, he guessed.
Time seemed eternal to him. Everything moved around so swiftly, yet it was still. He was comfortably numb. Everything was forgotten but the faint memory of the pain; and he held on to it with his dear, almost dead life. His dreams, “What were they?” he asked. He had drowned in the shock of the distrust that humanity had thrust on him.
But the time kept ticking, not waiting for him. Even in his stillness, he could feel it slip. In his oblivion, he could faintly hear someone scream, “We need to defib him! Quick, before we lose him!
“No pulse”, another voice said steadily.
“Let’s try again! Charging! Clear!” the doctor persisted.
He could hear the desperation in that unknown doctor’s voice. He had that same desperation in him to fight which was now suddenly stripped off him before he slipped in his assumed coma. He began cursing to no end, blaming humanity for crippling him off his dreams.
“We are losing him!” He could hear the faint panic in the second voice.
He was still unruffled, staying stubbornly in his oblivion. He was beginning to get more and more comfortable to the nothingness. This disconnect was giving him time to evaluate and rethink everything again, at the cost of his life. He wondered if this was a message for him to rethink his path, if it really was going to matter to his life in the future. He slipped some more in the oblivion, easing the pain of his emotions this time.
Probably this was it. Probably this is how it is supposed to be, and probably this is how he had to accept things and move on, he consoled himself. In his acceptance, he began to dream of his future, again.
His future, he thought.
“Give me more charge! Charging! Clear!” He went on screaming persistently.
That is when he felt his first shock. Shock of letting go something so dear – his future, seemed to bring back the pain.
“I see a faint pulse”, he could hear the faint betrayal of emotion in the second voice.
His could hear his own thoughts flashing violently in his head: Who would remember him, if he let go of this now? What would be the meaning of anything and everything if he had to let go of everything he loved without putting up a fight? Is it not worth putting up a fight at all, his dreams? And there, the epiphany hit him. He had to get out of his oblivion.
This was it, and he snapped.
“Let’s try one more time. Charging! Clear!!” doctor screamed again, without losing the desperation to keep this man alive.
He felt a sharp shock in his chest. The pain, the excruciating pain, it was coming back. He was beginning to feel it again. But it is good to be back he thought to himself and opened his eyes. He felt the struggle and was gasping for air, taking in as much as he could. He could hear the doctor scream with relief, “We’ve got him!”
He struggled to see his doctor and smile his thanks to him. But his doctor held him still and kept on telling him, “Keep still. We’ve got you now. We’ve got you now.”
Of course. He had to come back. This was his only chance. He now had something to fight for with all his strength again: