She walked barefoot. The sand was warm and there was no sign of shade anywhere. She walked and she walked. She walked away from a past she had long buried out of her soul. She walked till she suddenly found one bench in the middle of the her journey. She sat down, her invisible luggage sitting next to her, and she let her mind race.
It seemed like just a while ago that she was lying on her bed with blue bedspread. A phone lying next to her heart while she wondered how he must be doing today, after all these years. She closed her eyes, just for a moment it seemed, when she heard his voice. She seemed to have dialed his number and pretend that it was an innocent mistake.
He said, “Hello?” She heard his familiar voice from distance. She pretended to be asleep. “Hello”, he said again. A small pause. “Is this you?”, he asked. She panicked at his recognition and she let the line go dead.
And now, sitting on the bench, she wondered – was this really over in her heart? There was a strong “Yes” resounding in her head and that made things clear.
She got up again and walked along the shadowy path. Her boots in her hand, sand in her toes. She walked away from her home, hoping this action will leave the incident behind. Every step that she took, made her heart race with panic. She wanted to turn back and head home, bury herself in the comfort of her blanket. But some strange emotion in her made her keep walking ahead in the unknown.
She missed him. She missed his comfort. She missed his smell. “But this is momentary”, she tried telling herself.
Her heart raced again. Rebelling at every step that she would take.
She turned. She looked back. Giving in to the comfort. Acknowledging the madness of the situation. The baggage seemed lighter.
Then, she felt a jerk. Like she was falling from a cliff suddenly. She opened her eyes. There she was, buried, still in the comfort of her blanket. Lying on the bed with the blue bedspread. No sign of phone that she had thought was next to her.
A thought lingered in her head. The sound of his voice resounded in her head. The faint familiarity tugged at her heart.
But then again, it was over as soon as it has started.
She was free.